Given its long history, it should come as little surprise that 2nd Group has had a number of very good quotes over the years. Unfortunately, many good lines from the early days of the campaign have been lost to posterity, simply because I didn't keep track of quotes back in the beginning, but many remain for the perusal and amusement of this generation of players. Many old 2nd Group quotes are buried deep in the Fat Notebooks or scribbled on page corners in the group archives, so more will be added gradually as I comb through old sources. In addition to 2nd Group quotes, I've included a few quotes from other Kaerith solo characters, and one or two spoken by Tyke when he made his guest appearances in 3rd Group. If any of you have quotes not found here, be sure and let me know.
“Tonight, for dinner, Marcallis will be cooking a dead bird.”
&& Rondax announcing the menu at Prentice's father's inn &&
“Quiet, or you're not getting any air!”
&& Tyke to Danelesty while smuggling her in the portable hole &&
“Beaten peasant, stay away!”
&& Tyke to a disguised Flontara outside the Imperial Arena in Talagran &&
“We do good things down there. Like kill gnolls.”
&& Rondax on life in the Beastlands &&
“Who knows how to meditate, you punks?”
&& Scorpion trying to master his psychic abilities &&
“I'm getting beat over the head with a bunch of clubs to get you out of here, so shut up!”
&& Tyke rescuing Danelesty from a Homo erectustribe on the planet Vastrar &&
“We are a herd. Everything else is five or less.”
&& Rondax on the size of 2nd Group &&
“Marcallis…there's something out there.”
“There's always something out there.”
&& Bono and Marcallis when the former heard odd noises while on watch &&
“Yes! I'm a Kaerithian imp! I wear sunglasses!”
&& LAZ playing Drewcatch the Useless Kaerith,::::: solo characters, and thus included here" rel="">not strictly 2nd Group, but so far one of the only Kaerith solo characters, and thus included here &&
“I have a messiah complex. I also have a martyr complex. That means if you kill me, it'll only make me stornger. I'm your father, kid.”
&& Aragon Saramon trying to bypass a guard &&
“I'm here to pillage you!”
&& Tyke to an evil illusionist in Ranree &&
“Uhh…Ah! BOOM!”
&& Drewcatch the Useless spotting something to blow up &&
“Don't fraternize with the evil!”
&& Jean-Luc Stormslayer as Rondax talked to an alu-fiend &&
“Soft…”
&& Rondax stroking said alu-fiend's hair after she charmed him. &&
“Okay, evil. You're evil, and I want you to know that just because we have a common goal I'm in no way agreeing to work with you, okay?”
&& Jean-Luc, some time later, when forced to work with the alu-fiend to help escape the arena in Talagran &&
“Hook my cantrip up with a fat doobie.”
&& Steve Salas playing Tyke &&
“I'll use a sling. There are probably rocks around here.”
“Actually, no, there aren't.”
“I'll make some.”
&& Chris and Adam discussing Rondax's combat strategy in the Imperial Arena &&
“I usually do not eat your people.”
&& Tagnox the wemic to a zebranaur &&
“I did not know you minded us eating you. I will make a solemn vow that I will eat your people no longer, and we shall be friends.”
&& Ibid. &&
“Grandma's, like, an 8th-level wizard with ice rays and death spells.”
&& Chris speculating Natalia Angell's grandmother &&
“This donkey kicks ass.”
&& Jean-Luc, referring to his bonded mount &&
“All right. Why does it always have to be me? You people don't know how to treat your tikis right. Okay, clear out. Give me a dead rabbit and some plants.”
&& Rondax taking the appeasement of the gods into his own hands &&
“Don't kick me in the head.”
“I have other ways of waking you up.”
“I have other ways of putting you to sleep.”
&& Jean-Luc and Scorpion when Scorpion kicked JL awake &&
Jean-Luc: “Sir Bono!”
Bono: “Sir Jean-Luc!”
JL: “Let us go smite the evil!”
B: “We shall. But first let us eat, drink, and be merry!”
JL: “You can. I'll watch!”
&& Jean-Luc and Bono, context unknown &&
“If there's nothing down there, it's better than we find it than someone else.”
&& Bono on the search for Winnebago &&
“When it eats me, I'll kill it.”
&& Tyke facing a giant shark at one of his 3rd Group appearances &&
“I don't think there's a problem here.”
“Aiding and abetting an undead army! And making them smell nice.”
&& a Serinite guard captain and Tyke after discovering Tullintot's undead project in the tower cellar &&
“As soon as I kill you, I'm going to put a little tally mark on my character sheet.”
&& Jean-Luc to an evil mage &&
“You'd be surprised how strong Winnebagan women are. Why, I've seen Winnebagan women pick up half a goat and carry it on their backs.”
“Half a goat? Wemic women can pick up two gnolls and bring them back for questioning. \\That's the kind of woman I like.”
&& Brent Maverick and Rondax &&
“Fine. You two ongaknoks can just stay her and ongak each other to death.”
&& Rondax to Tyke and another wizard fighting in Redstone Prison &&
“Less ongaknok, better living.”
&& Rondax on the teleport bar around Winnebago &&
“You're a tool in the toolbox. We're all just tools for a greater good. Points at Steve
He's the biggest tool.”
&& Chris on the usefulness of 2nd Group's characters &&
“Point me at them and fire!”
&& Tyke trying to attack the Winnebagans &&
“All bones I see I crush with a warhammer.”
&& Sol Blackstar emerging from a savage battle with several undead. &&
NEW QUOTES 12-26-01
“The Kickyourbutt party is here.”
&& Rondax at the home of an evil illusionist in Ranree &&
Orcs is orcs.
&& Melurbian proverb, loosely meaning “Some things never change,” popularized after the unification and “civilization” of Gagneria &&
“All this chivalry makes me have to go to the bathroom.”
&& Chris in response to Jean-Luc's self-announcement and challenge at the home of the evil illusionist &&
“Buzwah!”
&& Rondax's first encounter with a raccoon (aka buzwah) &&
“I'm here to pillage you!”
&& Tyke to the evil illusionist &&
“Dwarves rock.”
&& LAZ upon hearing about a very deep dwarven mine &&
“Can I be a highwaymanwoman?”
&& Stacie creating her first Kaerithian character &&
“Tonight, for dinner, Marcallis will be cooking a dead bird.”
&& Rondax announcing the menu at Prentice's father's inn &&
“Quiet, or you're not getting any air!”
&& Tyke to Danelesty while smuggling her in the portable hole &&
“Beaten peasant, stay away!”
&& Tyke to a disguised Flontara outside the Imperial Arena in Talagran &&
“We do good things down there. Like kill gnolls.”
&& Rondax on life in the Beastlands &&
“Who knows how to meditate, you punks?”
&& Scorpion trying to master his psychic abilities &&
“I'm getting beat over the head with a bunch of clubs to get you out of here, so shut up!”
&& Tyke rescuing Danelesty from a Homo erectustribe on the planet Vastrar &&
“We are a herd. Everything else is five or less.”
&& Rondax on the size of 2nd Group &&
“Marcallis…there's something out there.”
“There's always something out there.”
&& Bono and Marcallis when the former heard odd noises while on watch &&
“Yes! I'm a Kaerithian imp! I wear sunglasses!”
&& LAZ playing Drewcatch the Useless Kaerith,::::: solo characters, and thus included here" rel="">not strictly 2nd Group, but so far one of the only Kaerith solo characters, and thus included here &&
“I have a messiah complex. I also have a martyr complex. That means if you kill me, it'll only make me stornger. I'm your father, kid.”
&& Aragon Saramon trying to bypass a guard &&
“I'm here to pillage you!”
&& Tyke to an evil illusionist in Ranree &&
“Uhh…Ah! BOOM!”
&& Drewcatch the Useless spotting something to blow up &&
“Don't fraternize with the evil!”
&& Jean-Luc Stormslayer as Rondax talked to an alu-fiend &&
“Soft…”
&& Rondax stroking said alu-fiend's hair after she charmed him. &&
“Okay, evil. You're evil, and I want you to know that just because we have a common goal I'm in no way agreeing to work with you, okay?”
&& Jean-Luc, some time later, when forced to work with the alu-fiend to help escape the arena in Talagran &&
“Hook my cantrip up with a fat doobie.”
&& Steve Salas playing Tyke &&
“I'll use a sling. There are probably rocks around here.”
“Actually, no, there aren't.”
“I'll make some.”
&& Chris and Adam discussing Rondax's combat strategy in the Imperial Arena &&
“I usually do not eat your people.”
&& Tagnox the wemic to a zebranaur &&
“I did not know you minded us eating you. I will make a solemn vow that I will eat your people no longer, and we shall be friends.”
&& Ibid. &&
“Grandma's, like, an 8th-level wizard with ice rays and death spells.”
&& Chris speculating Natalia Angell's grandmother &&
“This donkey kicks ass.”
&& Jean-Luc, referring to his bonded mount &&
“All right. Why does it always have to be me? You people don't know how to treat your tikis right. Okay, clear out. Give me a dead rabbit and some plants.”
&& Rondax taking the appeasement of the gods into his own hands &&
“Don't kick me in the head.”
“I have other ways of waking you up.”
“I have other ways of putting you to sleep.”
&& Jean-Luc and Scorpion when Scorpion kicked JL awake &&
Jean-Luc: “Sir Bono!”
Bono: “Sir Jean-Luc!”
JL: “Let us go smite the evil!”
B: “We shall. But first let us eat, drink, and be merry!”
JL: “You can. I'll watch!”
&& Jean-Luc and Bono, context unknown &&
“If there's nothing down there, it's better than we find it than someone else.”
&& Bono on the search for Winnebago &&
“When it eats me, I'll kill it.”
&& Tyke facing a giant shark at one of his 3rd Group appearances &&
“I don't think there's a problem here.”
“Aiding and abetting an undead army! And making them smell nice.”
&& a Serinite guard captain and Tyke after discovering Tullintot's undead project in the tower cellar &&
“As soon as I kill you, I'm going to put a little tally mark on my character sheet.”
&& Jean-Luc to an evil mage &&
“You'd be surprised how strong Winnebagan women are. Why, I've seen Winnebagan women pick up half a goat and carry it on their backs.”
“Half a goat? Wemic women can pick up two gnolls and bring them back for questioning. \\That's the kind of woman I like.”
&& Brent Maverick and Rondax &&
“Fine. You two ongaknoks can just stay her and ongak each other to death.”
&& Rondax to Tyke and another wizard fighting in Redstone Prison &&
“Less ongaknok, better living.”
&& Rondax on the teleport bar around Winnebago &&
“You're a tool in the toolbox. We're all just tools for a greater good. Points at Steve
He's the biggest tool.”
&& Chris on the usefulness of 2nd Group's characters &&
“Point me at them and fire!”
&& Tyke trying to attack the Winnebagans &&
“All bones I see I crush with a warhammer.”
&& Sol Blackstar emerging from a savage battle with several undead. &&
NEW QUOTES 12-26-01
“The Kickyourbutt party is here.”
&& Rondax at the home of an evil illusionist in Ranree &&
Orcs is orcs.
&& Melurbian proverb, loosely meaning “Some things never change,” popularized after the unification and “civilization” of Gagneria &&
“All this chivalry makes me have to go to the bathroom.”
&& Chris in response to Jean-Luc's self-announcement and challenge at the home of the evil illusionist &&
“Buzwah!”
crunch
&& Rondax's first encounter with a raccoon (aka buzwah) &&
“I'm here to pillage you!”
&& Tyke to the evil illusionist &&
“Dwarves rock.”
&& LAZ upon hearing about a very deep dwarven mine &&
“Can I be a highwaymanwoman?”
&& Stacie creating her first Kaerithian character &&
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