Club Doom Quotes

VP: "There are three times you dance in the streets: Killing your enemy, killing your enemy's friend, and killing your enemy's family."
N: "I killed a bug."
VP: "Did you kill its family?"
N: "I think it was an orphan."
--von Paine and Natasha as the latter danced in the street

VP: "I am Professor Ludwig von Paine."
E: "Pleased to meet you."
VP: "Yes, you are."
--von Paine and Elysia

"Kender don't taste very good. It's a survival trait."
--Ellia Tangletoes

"I guess if you can't find your way around your own city, you don't deserve to live anyway."
--Natasha after dazzling a rope merchant

E: "The quarterstaff is a great big piece of wood."
VP: "No, it's not! It's a finely tuned instrument of pain!"
--Ellia and von Paine when the latter lost his staff

"Why don't you have a fashion barbecue?"
--von Paine suggesting a test of Kerrick's skill

"It's like a Tupperware party. You discuss the latest in fashion over big, greasy, sloppy meat."
--Steve, trying to explain the concept of "fashion barbecue"

"Wow, they're like kender, except they're...people."
--Natasha Kournikova observing a Lonibramian procession

"Well, our chapterhouse in Krovista is a lot smaller, and it's...underground...so it's very hard to find."
--Kerrick explaining to a Blue Rose Knight why Club Doom came all the way to Crinon Iral to see blue roses

"The woman keeps a desperate garden in Strumpf. Most things die...but she is still fascinated by them."
--Kerrick, explaining Natasha's desire to see a blue rose